In October ...

by Jean Stewart
mommy to REBECCA "BECCA" CHRISTEN
10-16-98 through 1-1-99

Date: Mon, 25 Oct 1999 

In October

In October
When all the leaves have changed
When they are falling to the ground
And the big day comes around
I will remember
How you came to me on that warm day

In October
When your birthday comes
When I am saddened
To think you are already gone
I will remember
The sweet sound of your first cry

In October
When I am over come with fear
When I become afraid to open my eyes
And face the day of your birth without you
I will remember
What it felt like to be your mother
Even if only for a little while

In October
When I feel the tears come
When I hide them and fight for a fake smile
So no one will know how very badly it hurts
I will remember
You for who you were

In October
When I weep for you
When I think of how little time
You and I had to get to know one another

I will remember
That, for that little while, you were mine and I was yours

In October
When it becomes too much
When holding my head up is impossible
Because there are too many memories and too little time
I will remember
That you are happy and one day I will get the chance to make up for all our lost time.

In October........

I hope you have a birthday that brings you smiles and so much more, baby girl. Even though I won't be there I will be thinking of you the whole time. It may hurt and I may cry but I promise that this hurt will never compare to the love and joy I felt the day you were born. I just can't believe that a whole year has gone by since that day. What is even harder to believe is that you are already gone by. I know that we would have planned you a spectacular party, if only we had gotten the chance. Happy birthday my daughter.

Mommy still remembers and always will.
Love always and forever,
Mommy

This was written by me...Becca's mommy for her first birthday on October 16 1999.
Please e-mailme and visit her page if you want.
Angel_mommy_1999@yahoo.com
http://www.angelfire.com/tx2/angelbecca/