The Day Begins

for Daniel C. Roper, IV,
September 9, 1995 - December 4, 1995

by Janice Roper, 2/12/96

reprinted with permission

The day begins with a fiery circle,
painful to look at, creeping over the homes.
Laser feelers pierce the blinds,
slice my face. Another day
without Danny. Turn over
and pull the covers up.

The covers are warm and soft and the place
where Danny used to cuddle is dark,
the place begins at my heart and ends with his
tiny feet touching my thigh. My arms encircle him.
His head rests in my hand.
He faces me. We are dreaming
of all the adventures yet to come.

Facing the inside of my eyelids, the kiss
of an angel is a puff of cloud, an invisible breeze.
It splits in two with a hug,
drifts away in the haze of denial,
before reality pierces through
like a laser. The laser is a sword I use
to cut the world in half, looking for
my Danny
to be warm and whole again, to wake up
pink and breathing, to have his
little feet on my thigh.

The laser is a sword fate uses
to cut me in half,
watching to see what I will do.

Half of me gets up and goes to work.
The other half cuddles
Danny.