Eulogy for Joshua Alexander Migdol

1/17/97-1/17/97 (1818 grams, 48 cm)

This the eulogy that we read at Josh's memorial service yesterday. He was stillborn on January 17th at 6:40 AM due to a twisted umbilical cord. Please post it on your infant loss "First Person" page.

Thanks in advance,
Michael and Monique Migdol

January 26, 1997

It is typical at funerals to give a eulogy telling about what a wonderful person the deceased was, all of his accomplishments, and how his death will affect the community. For Joshua, who most of us never had the pleasure of meeting, writing a eulogy may seem kind of difficult. Surely, an unborn child cannot accomplish anything, right?

But indeed, it is not hard at all for us to eulogize our son. Throughout the past nine months, we grew to know Joshua and to love him. Even though we never saw him smile, yawn, or cry, we knew intimately what kinds of foods he liked and disliked; what kind of music made him dance, and put him at rest; and what kind of stories he preferred. We didn't think he was wonderful just because he existed - we knew he was wonderful because we knew him and loved him as a whole, complete person.

He accomplished much in his nine months. He taught both of us how the love between two people is not divided, but multiplied when they become three. He gave us a lifetime of memories and stories. And even in his death, we know that he will help us to cope, understand, and heal.

And as for the effect his death will have upon his community - I know all of us here have already been touched by the passing of Joshua. All of us were looking forward to getting to know him better; all of us were looking forward to seeing him grow and learn. Hopefully, in his death we can all gain a greater appreciation of that which life provides us, and a greater appreciation of what a great, wonderful gift children truly are.

Although life has struck us a terrible blow by taking our little Joshua from us, we are still able to count our many blessings. Monique's labor had the potential for becoming dangerous, but she came through it fine, and is healing well. She will have no problems bearing children in the future. But I believe that our biggest blessing has been all of you - despite being an ocean apart from our family, our community of friends in Japan has been so wonderful and supportive, that it is simply inconceivable to imagine how we would have coped through this difficult time without all of you. Thank you all for your kind words, your thoughts, your prayers, and your sympathy. And thank you all for coming today to share in our final farewell to Joshua.