Help ensure that the Global Internet services
of the SIDS Network continue to grow!

Donate directly to the SIDS Network securely with a major credit card.

Other ways to help can be found here.

To Find the Right Path

I've enclosed something I wrote a few years ago regarding my pain. Maybe it may help someone else find the right path. Thank you.
David G. Zufall
sunrise2@earthlink.net

12 Jul 1998

The finality of the death of a loved one is a cross one has to bear in their own way. For me, it was watching my son die in my arms. I watched as the life seeped out of him as my CPR and mouth to mouth had no effect. God was taking him to His world, a place of eternal life and joyous wonder. I have a Saint in my family now, an Angel if you will. The 17 days that God let me watch him, I now feel honored to have been given. I now sit and watch the days as my brother Bill's life is being taken from him with the cancer. I need to reflect on all the good things we had together, not the drunken arguments. I know he will be in a much better place when he leaves these earthly bounds, yet it is sad to me. I will miss him so much, yet I wonder if he really knows how much. The pain I feel inside is real, the tears are wet and salty. They must be real. So how am I able to sit here and say "No, do not leave me!" when I know he will be in Gods trusting hands? The dilemma for me is that I am a recovering alcoholic who is starting to love God again. Do I really have the strength in my heart to let my brother go? I do not think so. I have been praying for "things" for a long time and when the prayers were answered, they cost me dearly. I need to be able to just say "Thy will not mine be done".

For that I can do, God will know that He is still my Higher Power and I am not asking for anything specific. I cannot stop my brother from dying, just as I could not save my son. It is Gods will, I have no control over these things. To see the pain and anguish of another person losing a child, or anyone close to them is gut wrenching to me.

I have known the hurt, anguish and helplessness it causes us. I cannot avoid these people, too many of them avoided me in my time of need when all I needed was someone to say "I'm here if you need to talk". Most ran away for fear of saying the wrong thing. Sometimes, in a rare instance, they ran away because they could not handle the situation themselves. I understand that now. I forgave them a long time ago, and I can tell them I love them today.

If you know someone who needs to talk or even just sit quietly with, be there for them, please. It is not asking a lot to be a true friend. In fact, it is asking very little.

Help ensure that the Global Internet services
of the SIDS Network continue to grow!

Donate directly to the SIDS Network securely with a major credit card.

Other ways to help can be found here.

new.gif (112 bytes) Now you can translate SIDS Network Web Site pages to/from English, Spanish, French, German, Italian & Portuguese

1995-2017, SIDS Network, Inc. <http://sids-network.org>
All rights reserved. Permission to use, copy, and distribute this document, in whole or in part, for non-commercial use and without fee,
is hereby granted, provided that this copyright, permission notice, and appropriate credit to the SIDS Network, Inc. be included in all copies.

The opinions and information provided here are not necessarily those of the author and are presented for educational purposes only.
The author accepts no responsibility for content, accuracy or use.

Privacy Policy

Please report any web site problems to sidsnet1-at-sids-network-dot-org
Web Design and maintenance by
CAM Consulting